As dozens of media outlets have reported, reality TV star Josh Duggar has been outed as one of the 32 million people who used the cheating website Ashley Madison. Acknowledging the contradiction between adultery and the family values he espoused while part of the TV show 19 Kids and Counting and a director at the Family Research Council, Mr. Duggar declared, “I have been the biggest hypocrite ever.”
I’m not sure I entirely agree with his assessment. Perhaps it’s more accurate to say that he’s the hypocrite with the biggest spotlight on him right now.
Full disclosure: I have never watched 19 Kids and Counting. However, I suspect that if the Duggars are anything like me, they tried to show the best side of their large family, keeping dark secrets locked away from the public’s eye. That’s very understandable. But also unfortunate as it gave the impression that they – finally! – are the model Christian family everyone should imitate.
Well, that can only last so long. Although created in God’s image and filled with His Holy Spirit, I am tainted by sin. Sometimes sin sideswipes me in ways I didn’t see coming; sometimes I consciously choose to go down the wrong path. It’s the same with all the members of the Duggar family as well as everyone who professes Jesus as Lord.
I’m not saying this to justify a defeatist attitude, suggesting we may as well just give into to temptations to do things that hurt God, others, or ourselves. The apostle Paul pointedly said something about that. But I think it’s worth recognizing that to be a Christian simply means to be a hypocrite. On this side of the new heaven and new earth, I won’t follow Jesus perfectly. I’ll make mistakes and I’ll be impacted by others’ mistakes.
Does the media make a big deal about Christians caught in sin because Christians tend to put on a false front while the cameras are rolling? Do I think my message to the world must be that I’ve got it all together because I follow Jesus? If I was more humble and more quickly acknowledged my mistakes – while not ignoring the good things God is doing in and through me – perhaps people wouldn’t pounce all over me when one of those mistakes comes to light. Both Christians and non-Christians might say, “Yeah, he messed up. He warned us he would. Just like I do.”
Until Jesus returns, confession of sins and reaching out for forgiveness will be part of what it means to be human. Instead of pretending I’m something I’m not, my energy is better spent repenting and asking for forgiveness when I sin… as well as extending grace and forgiveness when the person next to me messes up, too.
It would be cool if the media caught some of that on camera once in a while.