David Letterman’s “confession” about sex

Last week, David Letterman of CBS’s Late Show admitted to having had sex at undisclosed points in time with women who work for him.  His admission was a response to a blackmail threat he received from a CBS employee who allegedly threatened to go public with this unless Mr. Letterman gave him $2 million.  By publicly admitting this, Mr. Letterman is attempting to diffuse a scandal: Now that the secret is out, the blackmail letter is useless.  The whole business has received publicity across American and Canadian networks (e.g. CBC’s pieces with their ensuing online discussions are here and here) and the video of the admission has been uploaded numerous times to YouTube…

I’m intrigued by the language David Letterman uses in this clip.  He quotes the blackmail letter writer as telling him: “I know that you do some terrible, terrible things.”  Accompanying the letter was a package, and “contained in the package,” says David Letterman, “was stuff to prove that I do terrible things.”

Although he expresses guilt, never in the clip does David Letterman admit that he himself recognizes that what he did was indeed terrible.  The closest he gets is saying that what he did was “embarrassing” to himself and the women involved.

At first I thought of David Letterman’s words as a confession.  But I don’t think that accurately describes it.  It’s more like he gives an admission to doing something, and I’m starting to see that admission and confession are not the same thing.  When you admit something, you’re not necessarily disclosing something bad that you’ve done.  On the other hand, when you confess something, you own up to the fact that what you did was indeed bad.  I will confess to my wife if I polished off the last of the ice cream.  I do not confess to my wife that I went and bought a bucket of ice cream.  (Well, uh, maybe I do need to confess how much ice cream I buy…  For another example:  I do not confess to my wife that I’ve washed and put away the dishes.)

Admission is the easier thing to do: It’s just stating a fact.  You let people know that you did something, but assign no moral value to that action.  It’s rather politically correct.  After all, what you did is your own business and no one has the right to suggest that your moral compass is wrong.

Confession is the harder thing to do: It indeed reveals that the morality of what you did is questionable at best and just plain wicked at worst.  That, in turn, prompts you to further action such as seeking forgiveness and repenting.  And when you repent, you declare that you are turning 180° away from what you did and towards something different.  When disciples of Jesus repent of their sins, they turn away from those sins and instead – by the grace of Jesus and with the help of the Holy Spirit – turn towards God and His will.  In one of his sermons, Matt Chandler from The Village Church in Highland Village TX defines repentance as “making war against your sin.”  This is politically incorrect, even offensive in a culture where everyone is entitled to their own sense of morality and where suggesting that what someone does is sinful could label you narrow-minded or a bigot.

Yet it is through repentance that we receive hope.  In her book, Speaking of Sin, theologian Barbara Brown Taylor writes that “the recognition that something is wrong is the first step towards setting it right again.  There is no help for those who admit no need of help … [and] no repair for those who insist that nothing is broken.”  After quoting Rev. Taylor, Peter Schuurman, a father of two and a professor at Redeemer University College, writes in Christian Courier: “‘Sin’ may be a four-letter word for many, but without it there can be no redemption.”

David Letterman may have minimized a scandal and perhaps even assuaged his guilt through his admission a few nights ago, but I wonder whether he is experiencing the marvellous, redemptive freedom gained by true confession.

Sword fighting

Telkwa CRC has launched “The Truth Project,” a 13-week comprehensive Biblical worldview study.  It asks us if we really believe that what we believe is really real, and then challenges us to compare how we think, speak and live against the truth of Scripture.

A day or two before the first session, I read another insightful piece in Kevin Harney’s book Seismic Shifts: The Little Changes that Make a Big Difference in Your Life that connects with knowing and living God’s Word in everyday life.  If we stop wielding “the sword of the Spirit,” we give Satan way too much room to fill our minds with his destructive lies.

When we read the Bible regularly and feast on the truth of God’s Word, we are training for the battles that lie ahead.  Owning a sword does not make a person a warrior.  Having ten swords around the house does not make someone more powerful.  Only practice will prepare us for battle.  Reading, studying, and knowing God’s Word prepares us to stand strong against spiritual attacks.  Too many people today have a stack of Bibles around the house but no idea how to use them.  It is time to train to fight the “spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”  We don’t have what it takes to win this battle in our own strength, but when we are armed with the Word of God and are trained to use it, we are ready to fight.  (p. 79)

Related: 
:: I quoted something about prayer from Seismic Shifts the other day. 
:: Swords picture comes from here.

Falling asleep while praying

From time to time, Monica or I (you’ll have to guess who) am asleep by the time the other is done praying at night in bed.  Sometimes we chuckle about it.  Sometimes it makes us feel guilty.

I just read this in Kevin G. Harney’s book Seismic Shifts (pp. 95-96)…

[This is] a picture that captures the heart of prayer.  It comes from a confession I have heard many Christians make over the years: “I feel guilty because there are many evenings I try to pray but end up falling asleep right in the middle of my prayer time.”  These people feel they let God down each time they doze off before uttering their official amen for the day.

This is what I tell them, and I hope it speaks to your heart.

Imagine a mother cradling her 5-year-old girl in her arms.  It is the end of the day, and the two are talking.  The mom is telling her about the plans for tomorrow.  The little girl is talking about the fun she had that day.  As the daughter talks, she yawns and rubs her eyes.  They keep chatting, but the little girl is fading quickly.  The mother looks down at the one she loves so tenderly.  As they are talking, in midsentence, her little girl falls asleep, right in her arms.

How does the mother feel?  Is she angry?  Disappointed?

As the mother looks on her precious daughter, she smiles and rejoices.  There is no other place she would rather have her little girl fall asleep.

When we end our day with God and we happen to doze off, He is not angry or disappointed.  He holds us in His arms, embraces us, and gives us a kiss on the forehead.  God loves to be with us, to speak to us, and hear what is on our hearts.  And if we happen to fall asleep in His arms, it brings joy to His heart.  There is no better place for us to end a busy day.

I think also of how sleep (and sleeping securely in safety) is a gift for which the psalmist prays (e.g. Psalm 3:5; Psalm 4:8).  Imagine God answering that request even before the psalmist is finished asking for it!

Book of Revelation: God wins!

Last week Sunday marked the beginning of a new series of messages/discussions I’m leading at Telkwa CRC on the book of Revelation.  The amount of unhelpful stuff written about this climax to the Bible is unbelievable.  Early 20th Century English writer G.K. Chesterton once remarked, “Though St. John the Evangelist saw many strange monsters in his vision, he saw no creature so wild as one of his own commentators!” (Orthodoxy, p. 10).

Thankfully there are also astute and insightful resources available.  Having read and reread Revelation several times, I am actually beginning to think that it is not as complicated as many people contend.  As Lew vander Meer and Bob Rozema contend, the message of Revelation can be summarized in two hope-filled words:  “God wins!”  Despite Revelation’s simple overall message, I remain grateful for vander Meer and Rozema’s work in addition to several others who have read and wrestled with the text and then write about it for the benefit of church.  I have quoted a number of them so far in Telkwa CRC’s journey through Revelation.  The first two reprinted below are about Revelation in general; the third quote reflects on the seven churches of Revelation described in Revelation 2-3…

The book of Revelation has taken a bad rap.  Once you get the hang of it, it really isn’t all that difficult.  It shouldn’t be left to the David Koresh’s of the world.  Almost all reputable interpreters today recognize that Revelation is poetry and liturgy.  It is not a Rand McNally map of heaven.  It is not a timetable for the end of the world.  It is not a “Bible Code.”  It is by no means as weird as we have been led to believe.  It is full of encouragement, hope, and comfort, especially for oppressed people.  When Archbishop Desmond Tutu of South Africa was fighting the good fight against apartheid all those decades, he used to say, “Don’t give up! Don’t get discouraged! I’ve read the end of the book! We win!”  The celestial vision arises out of the Revelation of Jesus Christ Himself, the Son of God who reigns in heaven and who has drawn back the curtain just for a moment to allow us a glimpse of God’s future.

Fleming Rutledge, The Bible and The New York Times, p. 17

[Revelation addresses] the [same] fundamental issue that was facing those who received the document in the first century:  Whom will I worship?  Someone has said that we human beings are incurably religious, meaning that we cannot but worship someone or something.  Who will it be?  The powers of the present age, or Jesus Christ?  To whom will we give our ultimate allegiance? In the imagery of the book – to the beast, with his seductive offer of pleasure and wealth, or to the slaughtered Lamb, with His offer of life?  Whom will we follow as we make our way through this world?  By whose value system will we walk?  Babylon-the-harlot’s, or New-Jerusalem-the-bride’s?  What will shape my lifestyle?  The Kingdom of God in Jesus Christ, or humanity in rebellion against God?

Darrell W. Johnson, Discipleship on the Edge (noted below), p. 21

The churches of the Revelation show us that churches are not Victorian parlours where everything is always picked up and ready for guests.  They are messy family rooms.  Entering a person’s house unexpectedly, we are sometimes met with a barrage of apologies.  St. John does not apologize.  Things are out of order, to be sure, but that is what happens to churches that are lived in.  They are not show rooms.  They are living rooms, and if the persons living in them are sinners, there are going to be clothes scattered about, handprints on the woodwork, and mud on the carpet.  For as long as Jesus insists on calling sinners and not the righteous to repentance – and there is no indication as yet that He has changed His policy in that regard – churches are going to be an embarrassment to the fastidious and an affront to the upright.  St. John simply sees them as lampstands: They are places, locations, where the light of Christ is shown.  They are not themselves the light.  There is nothing particularly glamorous about churches, nor, on the other hand, is there anything particularly shameful about them.  They simple are…

A corrupt church still functions as the church:  Dirty lampstands do not extinguish Christ’s light.  A prettified church [obsessed with looking perfect] still, despite itself, functions as a church:  Polished gold does not outshine Christ’s light.  Of course, it is better that it be neither of these things, neither tarnished out of neglect or polished in vanity.  It is better that it simply be there, unselfconsciously and inconspicuously receiving and sharing the light of Christ.

Eugene Peterson, Reversed Thunder, pp. 54-55

(If you are looking for a companion volume to read alongside Revelation, I highly recommend Discipleship on the Edge: An Expository Journey through the Book of Revelation by Darrell W. Johnson.)

God’s chisel

Thanks Lisa for putting this on your Facebook profile!  It’s a fantastic drama by The Skit Guys about becoming the disciple and masterpiece God intends…

Forgiving and forgetting

My colleague Rick Apperson has started a conversation about forgiveness over on his blog which makes me think of the expression “forgive and forget.”  Forgiving someone or asking for forgiveness are not easy things to do; however, they quickly seem elementary in comparison to forgetting the wrong that was done!  If you’ve been profoundly hurt or you’re carrying around guilt from something hurtful you yourself have done, how long does it take after forgiveness has been offered or received before you can completely forget about it?  Are we unspiritual or even sinful if we harbour these memories as we age or even when we die?

I appreciate how R. Paul Stevens wrestles with the wisdom of forgiving and forgetting in his book Marriage Spirituality: Ten Disciplines for Couples Who Love God:

Perhaps forgetting is not the inability to call up a recorded fact from the deep memory banks of our minds.  Rather, it is the willful decision not to keep calling it up for the purposes of reminder, as a weapon, or as an instrument to put another down. Now that is creative forgetting, and it is exactly what forgiveness inspires. (p. 137)

This is a practical way forgiveness plays out for me.  After forgiving a person, I can choose not to later say, “I remember when you…! This is just like the time you…!”  By avoiding this, I not only extend grace to the person I’ve forgiven, I think I also free myself of bitterness over the event since I’m not repeatedly rehearsing and retelling it.

I’ve been waiting all night for you to wake up!

A few weeks ago when Monica and I were saying good night, I said (in autopilot mode), “See you in the morning.”  Usually Monica replies affirmatively with a “Yep” or “Mm-hmm.”  On this particular night, Monica said, “I look forward to it.”

”Really?” I asked.

”Of course,” she said, rolling over.

Well, that gave me incentive to sleep well and wake up again in the morning, knowing that someone was looking forward to me being awake again!

I wonder if God says something similar to His children each night.  Does He look forward to us waking up again in the morning?  Is He almost childlike in His delight when our eyes blink open first thing in the morning?  If we listen, can we hear Him say, “I’m glad you’re awake again!  I’ve been working all through the night building my Kingdom.  All that’s missing now is you!  Please, let me lead you through this day by my Holy Spirit so you can participate in the good things I have planned.  I don’t want you to miss anything!”

It’s pretty encouraging to know one’s wife looks forward to her husband waking up after a good night’s sleep.  How much more amazing is it to know that our heavenly Father thinks the same thing about His children!  Let’s just not miss the ways He’s marked out for us nor the good things He’s been planning.

Life on the edge

I just finished reading Father to the Fatherless, the biography of Charles Mulli, the founder of Mulli Children’s Family Orphanage in Ndalani, Kenya.  It’s a powerful read, perhaps especially because a friend has shared with me his personal experience of meeting Mr. Mulli and working at his orphanage.

Charles Mulli grew up a poor orphan who was nevertheless able to find work and excel at any job he found.  He eventually became a rich Kenyan who even had connections with the president of the country.  But his heart went out to the orphan boys and girls of Kenya’s cities – children just like he once was.  He began selling everything he had accumulated to begin helping street children until he had spent virtually all his wealth.  Now, however, he believes he is richer than ever before.

Around the point they finally spent the very last of their wealth on orphans, Charles’ wife Esther asked him if he was completely sure of what they were doing.  He replied:

I’ve never regretted this decision…  It isn’t boring, is it?  …This is the edge.  This is real life.  The burden on us is too much to bear.  That’s how we know we’re in the right place.  Don’t be afraid.  God has to provide.  We have no other hope.  (p. 151)

Charles contends that we know we’re in the right place when we’re forced to depend entirely on God.  It reminds me of the first beatitude in Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount.

Along the same line of thought, Charles was once asked how he knew so certainly that God would come through for him and that things would work out.  Charles said:

The critical thing is faith, the belief that God will provide.  I ask myself the question: Why am I doing what I’m doing?  Is it for me, or is it for God?  And whether you are in ministry or in business or whatever you are doing, that’s the same question for all of us.  (p. 232)

More sticks and stones and hurtful words

Commenting on my post yesterday about the hurt words can cause, my colleague Rick Apperson reminded me of something in New Testament writer James’ letter:

Everyone should be quick to listen,
slow to speak,
and slow to become angry.  (James 1:19)

James is also the one who compares the tongue to the spark that starts a forest fire.  That analogy is very apt for those of us living in British Columbia where “more than 2000 forest fires have been sparked, stretching firefighting resources and forcing thousands of evacuations,” as CBC reports.  Members of the church I pastor are forest firefighters, so I have heard some firsthand reports of the havoc fires are causing around the province.  Wide swaths of backcountry popular with locals and tourists alike have been reduced to ashen rubble.  Countless hectares of trees and undergrowth have been ravaged, decimating the animals who lived in them.  Families have been forced out of their homes, some returning only to charred remains of what once used to be their house.

That’s what James compares a careless tongue to – the spark that sets off an inferno of destruction…

Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.  The tongue is also a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body.  It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.  (James 3:5-6)

No wonder we should think before we speak.

Photo:
Glenrosa Fire near Kelowna BC, July 2009, from CBC.ca’s “BC’s Wildfires in 2009” photo gallery.

Sticks and stones and hurtful words

If I asked for a show of hands Sunday morning for how many people have ever been hurt by someone else’s words, I think it’s safe to say that everyone would raise their hands.  Those of us who are older can probably think of multiple wounds we’ve received from the sharp arrows of others’ words.  But even the youngest can relate:  In surprise I spoke loudly at Jacob for something he did last week, but he thought my raised voice meant I was angry; with big tears and short breaths, he turned away from me to snuggle with and hide by Monica.  No one is immune to hurtful words.  There is probably no cliché more wrong than Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

People have known for a long time that that saying is a lie.  Written hundreds of years ago, the Heidelberg Catechism reminds us that the command to “not murder” (Ex 20:13) goes beyond not taking another person’s life.  When we – with the help of God – agree to live by the sixth commandment, we strive “not to belittle, insult, hate, or kill my neighbour – not by my thoughts, my words, my look, or gesture, and certainly not by actual deeds…” (Lord’s Day 40, Q&A 105).  Human nature – too often my nature and your nature – is that we say nasty things about people, and probably think things that are even worse, regardless of whether or not they’re even true.  But this is not at all what it looks like to love our neighbours as ourselves.

So, what can we do about this?  I suppose one option is to duct tape our mouths shut for the rest of our lives.  It’s extreme, yes, but it guarantees that we’ll never again say something that hurts another person.

Or, perhaps the words of the apostle Paul are more helpful:  “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  Here is a better direction in which to take our thoughts and words…

Continue reading here.